1. We had a kitten once that was majorly over-loved by our kids. It was constantly poked and prodded and everyone was always too close for comfort. That cat became a monster. Maybe it was always a monster, but I've always assumed nurture and not nature mutated Liv into her mean, cranky, violent ways. She was just so overstimulated by our excitement. Our baby is a lot like that cat. She's not a monster (fingers crossed it stays that way), but there are almost always six faces all up in her business at all times. And she is getting poked and prodded and loved like no baby has ever been loved before. The other night, we were watching a family movie but Hollie started cooing. We ended up pausing the show just to listen to her. When she took her first bite of baby food, all six of us were circled around her, cheering and giggling and filming. When I shouted out that she had the biggest poop, everyone wanted to see just how big the poop was. She is a spectacle. And I can only hope the overstimulation and attention doesn't turn her into a biting, clawing, monster who is terrified by the very sound of our voices. But for now, she adores every minute of the attention. And we all adore her.
2. Being 36 with a newborn has put me in a strange place. All of my friends have kids in school full time. Most of us have teenagers. These amazing moms are now working or just want to use the school time to get stuff done while I'm back to being a stay-at-home mother who needs to entertain a baby (and myself) again. But I also don't quite have a place with other moms of babies and toddlers because they are just in a different walk of life than me. I tried to join a group of (also amazing) new moms and they discussed new mom kind of stuff. I found myself continuously saying, "Oh yeah, when my kids were that age, they did this... or when my kids went through that, we did this..." Although I'm trying to relate, I sound like I'm just doling out advice because I've been through what they are going through right now. What stresses them out I just want to smile at because I know it will all be okay. The disparity in our experiences has made it hard to connect. I'm not struggling to find my new identity as a mom again, but I definitely don't feel like I've found my place yet.
3. Which leads me into this next one, I have really liked coming into a new baby with a ton of experience under my belt. I thought I would have to relearn everything but have been pleasantly surprised by how naturally a lot has come back to me. For instance, the other day, I totally went to the bathroom with a baby in my arms. Not to brag, but I was an expert. Or the other weekend we went for a family hike. The whole way back on the trail, Hollie was screaming her head off while Barry carried her. When we got back to the van, I asked him, "are you okay?" And he just shrugged and said, "oh yeah." Ten years ago, those screams would have grated both of us to our last nerve. We would've done anything to make her stop, but now it just rolls off our shoulders. We've been through fifteen years of crying children, so it's not such a big deal anymore. We've been through a lot in fifteen years of parenting. Don't get me wrong, I am NOT saying that life is a breeze because of my excellent momming skills. It is still challenging. But it just hasn't been as challenging in a lot of the ways I was expecting. Which is good because we are entering the murky waters of parenting a high schooler and I definitely don't have those skills yet.
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